Saturday, March 26, 2016

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Assalamualaikum, dear readers! ^_^

(as if I have any)

It has been long. Yeah, I still cannot avoid using the same intros since that's the truth. I can't even think of a title for my post. The thing is, I have been thinking a lot lately. Deep thoughts about lots of thing that I don't think I might, by any chance share here. That's me. I'm not someone who shares everything to everyone. :) It's just my nature.

But there are some things that are good to share too :) But as for the time being, I don't really have much to share. I'm just finding good reasons to write since I love doing so. I know I haven't been such a really good writer but writing just calms me, the same way when I read.

Typing, to be more specific is also magically a therapy to me. ^^ I just love keyboards. Maybe that's the reason I don't feel too burdened being appointed as secretaries in most organisations I joined at school. Also, I've been missing to write in Arabic. Yeah, it simply means I miss the school. I don't really have a focus to write today,so I'll let my fingers tap on the keyboard their favorite words! :) I knew that a good writer should have a good focus in writing and all but this is just for fun. Maybe not really but I'm not a good writer (or yet) so I'm excluded.

As time flies by, it has been almost a month after the SPM results went out. So my friends and I were all busy applying for university foundations / matriculation / diploma and etc. Yeah these applications keep making me think about the future. Now that I'm going through all these only makes me realize how challenging life is.

I believe it's normal for school students to hate schools but I (have to admit I love schooling). :) There's nothing I can do about me loving to go to school. Yeah, there were times when I wanted to go home too, but that was when I got a little depressed and homesick. Hehe. You can't be cool all the time, can you? :) Schooling, to me has been the best part of my life.

Now that I've ended schooling, I can already feel the burden my parents are bearing to help me succeed. They keep reminding me of the deadlines for scholarship applications and all. I would never even think of disappointing them, so I actively looked for scholarship applications and applied as much as I could. :) In shaa Allah, He'll provide something for me.

Now the main thing bugging in my mind is the course I'm applying for. For the past applications, I've focused on Biomedical Science. Because I love Biology so much. But I love English too. And I can't simply forget Arabic I love that too. And thinking of my result, my mom says I suit studying Law the most. And the funny thing now is I think that sometimes it would be helpful to hate certain subjects! Hahaha because if you happen to love all of them, you'll be confused of what to choose! That's what happening to me. That was just sarcasm but I quite mean it.

Regarding UPU application, I've focused on Biomedical Science too which means I'm planning to apply for Allied Health Sciences. I've had interest in Medic too. I know that humanity in reality is still in thirst for doctors. But the government isn't capable to provide quotas for more doctors. That's what people keep telling me. We don't have enough doctors but we have too much doctors. If you know what I mean. Also, my mom questioned my capability too. That made me think. Really, throughout all these times I only thought about my enthusiasm and dreams. But not my capability. It's harder to explain this with words but it has nothing to do with scared of blood. It's about me and stress control, also fatigues. Hmmm...

But I haven't really give up on Medic. It's still my dream- to contribute to humankind as much as I could. And because Biomedical Science is very close to it, I can say share the same motive, I opt to put it on the list. People also suggested and convinced me to choose Law for my participation in public speaking and debates, also for my scores in certain subjects. I'm not blindly rejecting Law but I still need to think about it. I can't say I'm not interested at all.

I've performed Solat Istikharah too. But it's still not clear for me. I'm planning to do it again. If I have anybody reading this, I hope that you will pray the best for me and also my friends. And not to forget STPM 2015 candidates too. They must be searching for the right places to pursue their dreams too.

Sometimes, I blame myself for writing too much but I can't handle it. Hehehe but I think that's all for now. What I'm hoping for any readers that may exist to learn are:

1. Seize your days at school and strive for success. 
Make every second of your schooldays worthy for dunya and akhirah. Learn every good things that you can possibly catch up with. They're gonna be helpful in the future, in shaa Allah.

2. Build up skills.
Be active in sports / any other extra- curricular activities that you're capable of. We can always learn new things and don't let it mess with your focus on studies.

3. Trace your interests and know your dream path. 
It's really puzzling to not know what to choose for your own future. Be well-planned. Don't be afraid of being unqualified. Struggle to pursue your dreams. Make yourself qualified.

4. THE MOST IMPORTANT : Stay close to the Creator, ALLAH SWT.
As His humble creation, we have no rights to be arrogant. We can always plan but He decides. Also, He knows the best for us. Therefore, the wisest thing to do is to work for our dreams, and pray for Allah's blessing. Thus, we can't approach Allah ONLY when we have requests, can we? This means that we have to work on a good relationship with Allah first, and be steadfast. I'm telling this to myself too :(

It's okay to approach Allah for certain purposes from the start. That's better than being further from him. Towards the end, we will understand our everlasting need for Allah's help and blessings. Only then, we will understand the real sincerity. He is ar Rahman and ar Raheem. The Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. 

My writings / speeches always end up melancholic. I can't help it.

For anybody who might ever read this, thank you.
See you guys later.
Assalamu 'alaikum :)